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  • Five Random Observations

    • I woke up yesterday and discovered that what I thought was allergies — after all, we live in the blooming land o' pollen — is actually turning into a cold. That explains why my grand desire in life is to curl up in a ball and stay in that spot.

    • With as much reality TV as is out there, you would think we could have at least one show dedicated to the stupid things drivers do.

    • I just looked at the schedule for the next three weeks and realized that being a tad overwhelmed does a disservice to "tad."

    • I’m not disparaging either sport, but I have no clue why anyone would listen to golf or NASCAR on the radio.

    • I want to hurt the person who came up with the "K A R S for Kids" jingle. Thanks a lot for that. Really.


  • Random Thoughts: Don’t Get Pithy With Me

    Why these lodge in my brain, I don’t know…

    • After Osama Bin Laden was killed: After 9/11, we united in mourning. Tonight, we united in celebration. Let's hope the next reunion doesn't take almost 10 years.

    • Rapture Observation #1: Sign of the pending apocalypse #2747 — The person cutting your hair compares your cowlicks to crop circles.

    • Rapture Observation #2: Note to friends who like R.E.M. — If it really is the end of the world as we know it, then why am I not feeling better about the situation?

    • Rapture Observation #3: OK, so who said the Rapture had to occur at 6 p.m. EST? Not that I'm worried or anything, but I think we gotta give it until 6 p.m. PST. No wait, what other countries are not in our time zone? Should we wait until 6 p.m. their time, too? At this rate, it could be Tuesday here before it's Rapture time somewhere else, so I guess I just have to stay tuned... Or not.

    • When the Day is Just Not Going Well #1: I’ve had the sort of day that can be summarized in this lyric: "Sometimes you're the windshield. Sometimes you're the bug."

    • Religion and Sports: I enjoyed reuniting with Seekers (not the Rapture kind) for three hours of softball practice/scrimmaging today. Despite not having played for almost a year, I was in midseason form. (Of course, when you have no form, the time of the season truly doesn't matter...)

    • Obscure Pop Culture Reference #1: Airing tonight on TNT in a 24-hour continuous loop — "An Easter Story" (2011). Ralphie's grandson is relentless in his pursuit of a new golf umbrella as he walks the streets of Manhattan. The only problem: His parents won't let him get one because they're the only parents who believe that umbrellas will poke someone's eye out.

    • Why Would Anyone Do This? Bumper sticker of the day, seen on a car pulling into a Wal-Mart: "My baby daddy was inmate of the month. Freedom Bail Bonds."

    • When It Is 105 Degrees Outside … In June: I’m not terribly familiar with the game of golf, but I'm convinced that Mother Nature needs a mulligan.

    • Beauty Tip of the Day: I can assure you, if I ever get to take a vacation, you won't see a picture of my feet by the water. Nothing against the water; I just don't like my feet.

    • Obscure Pop Culture Reference #2: There's so much spam on Facebook today (Osama, how you look in 40 years) that I'm starting to feel like a Monty Python group member at an all-you-can-eat buffet.

    • The Power of Creativity: I’ve been listening to music this evening — the usual diverse groups of musicians who make no sense on anyone's mix tape — and am reminded of the power of creativity that electrifies our lives. If I can tap into that collective for just a few minutes, then life as I know it will be complete.

    • When the Day is Just Not Going Well #2: It's a bad day when you feel like approaching the convenience store clerk with a 12-pack of beer and asking if they have a co-pay.

    • The After the Sleepless Night Because of the Hurricane: Based on Facebook status updates in the Greater Washington D.C. area, WTOP has announced that a "nap watch" will start at noon today and move into a "nap warning" by 3 p.m.

    • After a Hurricane and an Earthquake in the Course of 2 Weeks: My nominee for Time's Person of the Year — Mother Nature.

    • Overheard at Lunch: "Nothing ticks me off more than eavesdropping on a boring conversation."

    • OK, So This One is Pretty Pithy: You know you're a grown up when writer's block replaces penis envy on the top 10 list of stressors in your life.

    • When the Day is Just Not Going Well #3: It's a bad day when you walk into a meeting and the other person excuses himself to get his wet blanket out of the car.